huh. here i go again.
i REALLY dont know what is super wrong with me.
i have been feeling uneasy at night..
huh. and it seems like my feelings are hurt and as if something bad is going to happen!

huh. ok lets forget abt it fr a moment..
today was not great but i think it was rather ok.
came earli in the morning at 10 (supposedly)
idk why but it seems like buses hate me lotss.
cs recently i have to wait super long for them to come..
but surprisingly it doesnt take long fr 34 to come (:
so as a result i can go home earli after duty ((:
AIIIITS! i think i better dont say anymore.
otherwise later 34 take ages to come too! LOL
ok. then, i saw derek taking 8 too.
hahas well im not obsessed or a stalker ok.
its just that whenever i see him, i rmb jaejoong lol
not that they look a like but hummm.
how should i put thiss..
i think they have similar sense of fashion lol
ok. lets not drag this further..
ok then went to do geog travel.
truthfully. i could not concentrate cos my mind was like calling me fr food :P
so helena, jeremiah and jo!
i am not kidding when i say our brains need glucose to function ok?
its TRUE!
and i have a real life example ^^

then went to mensa to have lunch..
while walking near bizpark, i was saying that the yr 3s are back..
but i havent see any of them..
after lunch maha,derick, crystal and me went to student lounge to check on their camp result thingy.. but because it wasnt there we went to see the tpsu board..
and then headed to our lecture hall for BCS..
hahas :p
yea. u dont read it wrongly..
i actualli went fr it! :P
its because its revision lecture.. if i dont go then i wont know what topics are going to be tested..
and u know actualli im supposed to be studying fr my mock test and do my reading fr leadership presentation or prepare japanese props..
instead im here blogging. hahas :p
okok im gulity ok?

i saw mad alias my lil tinkerbell
and had a short convo with her..
she looks like a secondary school girl from a far lol
looks so innocent.. lol :p
wanted to have lunch with her this wed but as usual she is too busy..
hahas :p
anyway, she promised to meet up for lunch soon :D
hahas just to clarify with you that im NOT a les k! :P lol

ooh. i have been very very blur recently.
like i dunno wats going on and stuff.
and i have been ignoring ppl.
like normally i will jump up nad down to great someone and say hi.
but i realise now adays i will just like smile if that person sees me..
if not i dont even bother to greet..
why ahh??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tired is just an excuse..
adn i know it..
im nver too tired to greet anyone.
lazy is just another excuse!!!!!!!!!!!
i seriously want to know what is wrong with me??????!
shall i go to the doctor and check??
or should i go to the psychologists?? :P lol

had a large cup of milo after lecture! :D
while going to buy it i saw mas!
and she was like "no" when i asked fr a hug twice..lol :P
she is very bad right? lol :P
no lah. its cs she's in the hurry..
but in the end she said, "come i give u a hug first" lol :p
i seriously miss them! TT.TT

and went to the benches near lab 1 (the one near guys toilet)
and saw roy. (i just said that i havent seen any of them and today i saw many! :P)
he was like, "are u free this thurs or fri?"
i tot he needs my help or what or need to talk to me abt sth imp..
its actualli abt the main comm interview!
OMG!!! i was like SHUT! T,T
i realli dont wanna go fr another interview.. HUHUHU
and i hope this time round i wont get jo to interview me..
yea i know its like his last year and may be the last time im going to work with him..
its not that i dont want to work with him or what..
well. what am i saying?
lol :P but u get my point right..
huh ok i explain again..
because this is their last year (yr 3s) so i wont be able to work together with them again in the future.. adn by right i should treasure all the time that im left with working with them n learn as much as i can.. but the problem is i dont want to be interviewd by them which is should not be the case.. so instead of going by the right side im going by the left side.. lol (so cold :P)
anyway. i dont want to be interviewd especially by jo! cs he is super scary!
lol :P ok. may be he is not that scary.
but i still remember my very first pace interview was done by him and zoe..
i dare NOT look at him.. and i almost looked down (well i cant rmb if i did that or not :P)
but im sure of one thing if my interviewer is him..
my morale will definitely be pushed down! LOL
and im sure he will shoot thousand questions from the sky! LOL :P
and if thats the case i wont be able to explain nad reason evrything like the way he always does..
i have no sense of logic T,T
and may be its because of his outlook.
idk. but he always give me this feeling that he is being serious.
so he looks serious each second without exception.. to me lahh..
HUH. how to deal with this kind of person??
i realli dont know..
how i wish i can be more flexible and more outgoing..
how i wish i dont take everythings into my heart..
and make my mind work to think about them all the time..
i realli have problem dealing with people.. HUH
and i really want Mad to know that im not one who can communicate with anyone..
im not as friendly and open minded as she thinks i am..
i realli want to tell her that i do not fit to be in the main comm.
i seriously do. but i feel bad.
i feel like i do not give myself a single chance.
i feel like i deserve a try..
but..
i dont want to disappoint anyone.
i dont want to affact everyone..


should i be selfish this time??




if i can just fly...

huh. here i go again.
i REALLY dont know what is super wrong with me.
i have been feeling uneasy at night..
huh. and it seems like my feelings are hurt and as if something bad is going to happen!

huh. ok lets forget abt it fr a moment..
today was not great but i think it was rather ok.
came earli in the morning at 10 (supposedly)
idk why but it seems like buses hate me lotss.
cs recently i have to wait super long for them to come..
but surprisingly it doesnt take long fr 34 to come (:
so as a result i can go home earli after duty ((:
AIIIITS! i think i better dont say anymore.
otherwise later 34 take ages to come too! LOL
ok. then, i saw derek taking 8 too.
hahas well im not obsessed or a stalker ok.
its just that whenever i see him, i rmb jaejoong lol
not that they look a like but hummm.
how should i put thiss..
i think they have similar sense of fashion lol
ok. lets not drag this further..
ok then went to do geog travel.
truthfully. i could not concentrate cos my mind was like calling me fr food :P
so helena, jeremiah and jo!
i am not kidding when i say our brains need glucose to function ok?
its TRUE!
and i have a real life example ^^

then went to mensa to have lunch..
while walking near bizpark, i was saying that the yr 3s are back..
but i havent see any of them..
after lunch maha,derick, crystal and me went to student lounge to check on their camp result thingy.. but because it wasnt there we went to see the tpsu board..
and then headed to our lecture hall for BCS..
hahas :p
yea. u dont read it wrongly..
i actualli went fr it! :P
its because its revision lecture.. if i dont go then i wont know what topics are going to be tested..
and u know actualli im supposed to be studying fr my mock test and do my reading fr leadership presentation or prepare japanese props..
instead im here blogging. hahas :p
okok im gulity ok?

i saw mad alias my lil tinkerbell
and had a short convo with her..
she looks like a secondary school girl from a far lol
looks so innocent.. lol :p
wanted to have lunch with her this wed but as usual she is too busy..
hahas :p
anyway, she promised to meet up for lunch soon :D
hahas just to clarify with you that im NOT a les k! :P lol

ooh. i have been very very blur recently.
like i dunno wats going on and stuff.
and i have been ignoring ppl.
like normally i will jump up nad down to great someone and say hi.
but i realise now adays i will just like smile if that person sees me..
if not i dont even bother to greet..
why ahh??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tired is just an excuse..
adn i know it..
im nver too tired to greet anyone.
lazy is just another excuse!!!!!!!!!!!
i seriously want to know what is wrong with me??????!
shall i go to the doctor and check??
or should i go to the psychologists?? :P lol

had a large cup of milo after lecture! :D
while going to buy it i saw mas!
and she was like "no" when i asked fr a hug twice..lol :P
she is very bad right? lol :P
no lah. its cs she's in the hurry..
but in the end she said, "come i give u a hug first" lol :p
i seriously miss them! TT.TT

and went to the benches near lab 1 (the one near guys toilet)
and saw roy. (i just said that i havent seen any of them and today i saw many! :P)
he was like, "are u free this thurs or fri?"
i tot he needs my help or what or need to talk to me abt sth imp..
its actualli abt the main comm interview!
OMG!!! i was like SHUT! T,T
i realli dont wanna go fr another interview.. HUHUHU
and i hope this time round i wont get jo to interview me..
yea i know its like his last year and may be the last time im going to work with him..
its not that i dont want to work with him or what..
well. what am i saying?
lol :P but u get my point right..
huh ok i explain again..
because this is their last year (yr 3s) so i wont be able to work together with them again in the future.. adn by right i should treasure all the time that im left with working with them n learn as much as i can.. but the problem is i dont want to be interviewd by them which is should not be the case.. so instead of going by the right side im going by the left side.. lol (so cold :P)
anyway. i dont want to be interviewd especially by jo! cs he is super scary!
lol :P ok. may be he is not that scary.
but i still remember my very first pace interview was done by him and zoe..
i dare NOT look at him.. and i almost looked down (well i cant rmb if i did that or not :P)
but im sure of one thing if my interviewer is him..
my morale will definitely be pushed down! LOL
and im sure he will shoot thousand questions from the sky! LOL :P
and if thats the case i wont be able to explain nad reason evrything like the way he always does..
i have no sense of logic T,T
and may be its because of his outlook.
idk. but he always give me this feeling that he is being serious.
so he looks serious each second without exception.. to me lahh..
HUH. how to deal with this kind of person??
i realli dont know..
how i wish i can be more flexible and more outgoing..
how i wish i dont take everythings into my heart..
and make my mind work to think about them all the time..
i realli have problem dealing with people.. HUH
and i really want Mad to know that im not one who can communicate with anyone..
im not as friendly and open minded as she thinks i am..
i realli want to tell her that i do not fit to be in the main comm.
i seriously do. but i feel bad.
i feel like i do not give myself a single chance.
i feel like i deserve a try..
but..
i dont want to disappoint anyone.
i dont want to affact everyone..


should i be selfish this time??




if i can just fly...